I'm sitting here just thinking about how enjoyable this time has been. How aroused I am by you. How perky I am at the thought of you. All of my senses heightened. When you're around, all I can think about is how you make me feel. 

It flows. 

Everything that we've done thus far has been amazing. Even with our slip-ups and mishaps, I enjoy it. As random as our meetings have been, they were all so soothing. Seeing someone naked is not just bearing all skin. It is more than us with no clothes on. Everything was exposed. It's a moment of vulnerability and accountability. 

The time that we've spent together has been nothing short of refreshing. But what are we doing? What is going on here? Sometimes I want the answers, but most times, I want to live in the moment. 

We are the moment. 

We just let life go as it should be. There's no actual formula to what we have going on. 

It flows.

I've been in such a weird place these days, but you've given me something like a master reset. Life's issues melted away as I melted in your hands. I came alive again. Good things don't last forever, but I'll be ok with the feeling being everlasting. We make the most of the time that we're here.

It flows. 

The way my body responds to you makes me nervous because I haven't felt this way in a while. My creative juices flowed as my mind wandered. Everything else flowed as your hands roamed my slightly blemished canvas. The writing was on the wall long before your writing was on mine. 

It flows.

Listening to your voice and all that you say to me makes all of my issues minuscule. Although they do not disappear, they are no longer at the forefront of my life. I like this. And as long as it flows, I want it. I'm not sure if it's the urge or the genuine chemistry. I do know that I enjoy the chemistry between us. You know the vibes. Random thoughts and rambling sometimes get the best of me, but it's a part of the process. 

Forever flowing. 

We took a Girl's Trip to San Pedro, Belize in February. This was our first time there and definitely not the last. Some of the footage was lost in translation. Negative Covid-19 tests were required for both entry into Belize and returning to the US. You have to upload your declaration on Belize's health app. Feel free to ask questions in the comment section.

Here’s a little behind the scenes footage from my photoshoot for These Pink Matters book.

Enjoy the videos and music you love, upload original content, and share it all with friends, family, and the world on YouTube.

This was my first trip to LA and first vlog. It wasn’t planned, so I just used the time to catch up with old friends. Shout out to American Airlines for making me use my flight credit before the year ended instead of 365 days after being issued smh. I stayed at the Intercontinental Downtown LA and LOVED it. We went to Perch LA, Via Alloro Beverly Hills, The Waldorf Astoria Beverly Hills, Shutters Santa Monica, The Santa Monica Pier, Blue Plate Tacos Santa Monica and S& J Hookah Hollywood. Enjoy

Don’t let history hold you or the future fold you. Why wade?

Sometimes letting go is your best bet. Don't let history hold you or the future fold you. This poem is featured in my new book, These Pink Matters. Use Code Lov...

Before I knew it, I was sitting on the balcony with tears forming in my eyes. Our conversation was saddening yet uplifting. The revelation of so many things about myself was terrifying. I was standing in front of a mirror, and it began to speak of my life. Sometimes it's easier to accept things when the person on the other end isn't directly involved, but they love you enough to tell you that you're wildin. I was Wildin.

When you have reciprocated energy, it's easier to listen. You're not thinking of possible judgment or finger-pointing. It didn't exist. We looked for solutions and how to avoid the same situations.

Past trauma is a bitch. The bigger bitch is when you leave it to heal itself.

Having this conversation was the last thing that I expected to happen. Not in a sense that it shouldn't happen, but more so that it wouldn't happen. There was so much to catch up on. We hadn't had a chance to sit down and talk in years. This trip wasn't only for turning up. It was to wind down. It allowed us to realign our chakras balance these energies. With all that was going on, we both deserved a break. Stress and drama were at an all-time high, and neither of us deserved to keep dealing with it.

This experience was new and welcomed. We had a different type of vibe. It's a different type of high when you're homie, lover, friends. Life threw us all sorts of curveballs, but here we are. It was golden. Every part of it made sense and felt right. This wasn't your typical love story.

The sun's rays shined on us throughout the trip, from start to finish. It was a blessing to be able to enjoy life together. This impromptu trip lined up perfectly. As nervous as I was, knowing that I was about to explore life with one of my best friends kept me at ease. There's a different sense of security when you know that you can stand completely naked in front of the person you're with. Flaws on front street, I became more comfortable with myself. Being forced to look at myself with the lights on was uncomfortable yet liberating.

We prefer not to face so many things about ourselves, but here I was, walking back and forth with my soul showing. I had my heart on my sleeve, and my feelings had a megaphone. I embraced this newly turned page. With my book dropping in a few weeks, I felt like this was the mental and physical cleanse that would prepare me for what was to come. The level up pulled up all gas, no brakes. Not many things take me out of my comfort zone, but this very moment made me shift in my seat. It made me step back and take a look from the outside.

Here I was, revealing my whole self in front of someone I loved since I was 12 years old. Who better to do this with? Who was more fitting to share this space? Throughout all of the years of friendship, THIS was the moment. My heartbeat was different. My smile was different. My breathing was neither labored nor rapid. It felt good to be able to relax. I was able to rest and be at ease.

It felt as if 1000 pounds had been lifted off of my shoulders. I felt so much lighter.

As weird as it sounds, this was probably the moment that I needed this year. 2020 has been a raggedy bitch, and this was an escape. It gave a new outlook. It expanded my mind. Looking at myself through his eye, I wanted to cry. How dare he expose my truth while looking me directly in my eyes? Where is the part where we just let go of all inhibitions and indulge in life's uncertainties? That sounds good and all, but that's not how we operate.

Having a friendlationship built on love and respect hit differently. I knew that all of these words came from a place of concern. I was exposing small truths that we'd never had to discuss, and it left me in a different space. I began to rise from this sunken place. I was uplifted without my consent or control. The compliments and clean-cut advice made me squirm. Not because I was uncomfortable, but because I knew I deserved it and never really had someone outright say it.

Knowing your worth is one thing, but having the conversation freely and genuinely with someone you care about is another. I think back on the trip, and I smile. I have flashbacks of the laughter, the tears, the memories, and it gets me through the rough days. It was a last-minute trip with no expectations other than enjoying ourselves. I can't say how happy I was to take it or how I couldn't have picked a better person to share it with.

This was the first of many trips. We made it one to put in the books. How do we top this without getting arrested abroad? Until the next flight.

To you, I Love You. All love. All ways. Always.

Sometimes we sell ourselves short and never understand our worth. 

You know you’d never let a man get away with subjecting you to so much hurt. 

You can’t seem to understand how he can love you yet dislike you.

Open your eyes and tighten up. Babygirl, please break the cycle. 

I wanted to love you forever but I couldn't. Battered skin and tear-filled eyes. I wish the rain washed the pain away but it wouldn't. 

Everytime that I step close, I brace for impact. 

I often wonder where I went wrong. The bad days outnumber the good. This is the same sad song.

You continue to hurt me. You’ve made it clear who is in control. The longer I stay, the more I feel that I’m not worthy.

How canI leave? I remember no one before and think of no one after you. I'm not sure if I can breathe. 

Or is it your tight grasp around my neck? You say sorry as you kiss the tears away. You say It’s how you keep things in check.

My body is weary. I continue to hide the scars. No way my bruised heart can think clearly. 

You tried to strip me of everything that I had to offer. Pay up or shut up. It’s sure gon cost ya. 

I was able to escape it. No woman should ever have to “just take it.”

We used to be ride or die & it still holds true but I’ll ride for me while you die for you.

It took me a while to realize how blissful ignorance was. How often people place blame despite looking in a freshly cleaned mirror. Excuses are made as relationships are ruined. Friendships are broken.  One day, all is well in the world, and the next, nothing makes sense.

So many things in life are unexplainable. We can't figure out a direction to go in.

Some find comfort in chaotic experiences. 

Somehow, we always find a way to organize chaos and make some sense of it all. Why do we normalize uprooting and repotting instead of exposing the root of the issue at hand? The new soil gave no solution or answers, but we like the way it looks because we've eliminated the memory of it being in the same pot. 

The issue is rarely the information disclosed.

We blame the disconnect on the messenger without taking heed to the message. If you tell me that your bank account is negative today and I tell you that your account is negative the following week, what has changed? Is your account not overdrawn? The message remained the same while the messenger changed. We see the logic behind acceptance, yet the fact that it wasn't through a preferred channel, we reject it. The original programming hasn't changed. The station becomes muted, and we continue our lives on a different channel.

A lot of things in life come with hard pills to swallow.

We learn many things through experience, but differentiating between right and wrong doesn't fall in that category. You may need the experience to raise a child, but don't need it to love them. You don't have to have a significant other to understand respect or boundaries. Even as friends, transparency shouldn't come with terms and conditions. 

People will disagree on things, not see eye to eye or choose to part ways, but that shouldn't negate the facts.

Life consists of multiple phases. No one stage is more important than the previous or next. We outgrow, we unlock new areas, we self reflect, and it's all a part of the process. No matter how hard things are, remember why you chose to remain where you are. Remember that you determine your happiness. People can contribute to it, but it's up to you to take control of the rollercoaster. When I tattooed "No Love Lost" on my collar, it was for one particular situation. After all of these years, I find myself reflecting on it and remembering the original reason. We can move on and be at peace. Look in the mirror every once in a while and reflect. 

Perception isn't always reality, but we have to take it for what it is.